Thursday, September 24, 2009

Some HSN Recommendations: Tasteful, Understated Jewelry

When I was sixteen, my grandparents gave me a ring for my birthday. It was my first "real" piece of jewelry: real gold, a real garnet (my birthstone) and a real itty bitty diamond. My grandmother got my great-uncle, who messed around with jewelry and metalwork, to custom-make the ring. It is in the shape of a turtle. The body of the turtle is the garnet, the head is the diamond, and the prongs that hold the garnet are its legs. Here it is:

(Sorry, late-night blogging is not conducive to great photography.)

I have worn this ring for years. I thought it understated, elegant, and sweet.

What a sucker. If only my grandmother had watched the Home Shopping Network, where they sell jewelry that REALLY looks like animals. Here is their take on the turtle:

I know you can't tell but that's a ring. All of the jewelry featured in today's "Deb's Tasteful Jewelry Showcase And Rib Hut on Tuesday Nights" are rings. I know you love that turtle, but we've got more.
How many times have you thought, "I want a tiny panda bear to live on my finger and judge me?" Here you go.
If you're the kind of lady (or man, I don't judge) that prefers to spell "classy" with a "k," this ring is for you. Rowr.
Hoo? Hoo? Hoo...could say no to this startlingly lifelike owl?

When I look over my jewelry collection, I can truly say I have nothing like this piece. Maybe someday I will...should the right circumstances arise...I can't think of what those circumstances would be, but it would have to be fairly extraordinary...something truly impossible happening in a very spectacular way... Well, whatever it is, this is a charming piece that positively sparkles with subtlety.

Had one of those nights? One where the fun has flowed so freely that now you're seeing pink elephants? Now you can commemorate it with this piece of jewelry.

All of the above pieces are real, on the Home Shopping Network. They are all constructed of genuine cubic zirconia and other materials. They are all available for sale. I cannot imagine anyone who would not enjoy one, or all, of these for their next birthday or major religious holiday.

But act quickly, because they can't last long!

I beg you.


Barbaloot said...

Oh wow-that flying pig...I have no words really.

Seriously, your ring is hugely understated and classy and really---who would ever want that? :)

-stephanie- said...

Read about you over at Sneaky Momma's. You're pretty funny.
I love these rings. If I ever need guady in an elegant way this is the place to go.

Kristina P. said...

Maybe I can get one of a pirhana.

Anonymous said...

Just so you know, My mom, your grandmother, was a big fan of HSN!!
Love ya!
Aunt Nancy