Though clearly my birthday is the most important one celebrated today, there are others who are celebrating today as well. If you look closely, you will see a uniting theme betwixt myself and all of the celebrities who share my day:
1. Adam Lambert
You might think Adam and I share amazing charisma, or a penchant for black nail polish. True. More importantly, we share truly magnificent, inexplicable bangs:
2. Oprah Winfrey
Like Oprah, I am a successful woman of color who has made it in a man's world. Okay, I'm not in a "man's world," since 99% of my co-workers are female. "Successful" might also be a stretch, seeing as how I routinely go weeks without checking my mail. I am a woman, though, and "Caucasian" is a color, right?
3. Tom Selleck
Like Mr. Selleck, I have wavered between full commitment to my mustache and just wanting to cut it off and be taken seriously for a change. Tom, keep fighting. It's worth it.
4. Jonny Lang, Andrew Keegan, Sara Gilbert, Heather Graham, Greg Louganis, Teresa Teng, Ann Jillian, Katharine Ross, John Forsythe, Victor Mature, W. C. Fields, and assassinated president William McKinley also share this birthday. Like me, most of them remember the '70's fondly. Those who don't I'm sure would have enjoyed it.
So there it is, friends, proof of my greatness. For, as the great W.C. Fields once said, "Madam, you may be drunk, but when you're ugly things go to pot. Bleah."
Have a good weekend!