Getting the horns off the pot

I love it when people use the wrong word.  Remember "The Summer of George" on Seinfeld, where Jerry used "decompose" instead of "decompress?"  That's what I'm talking about.  I particularly love it when people are trying to impress somebody by using a "big word," and they use the wrong one.

I also love to mix metaphors.  I think it is hilarious.  However, when I do it, people either correct me or don't get it at all.  When did people stop using those funny, metaphorical sayings?  "We've got to strike while the iron is hot," for example.  I know no one smelts anything anymore, but one doesn't need to be a smelter to understand the reference, right?  But I digest...

Mixing up vocabulary can be a wonderful humor test.  If you watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta (which I do, but ironically), you remember Kim spelling "cat" with a "k," seeming to not know that she had just spelled the word wrong?  Wasn't that great?  That's how I feel when someone uses the word "continent" instead of "consonant," or "detonation" instead of "denotation."  I love it, and laugh merrily on the inside while, externally, I am frowning to indicate my level of commitment to the conversation.

So, to circumcise: Using a totally inappropriate word is something I find completely hysterical.  I intend to continue to enjoy it; I might as well have my cake and go to Rome when my pants catch fire in the bush.

I've been Cited!

I ran into my mentor the other night (yes, I have a mentor, doesn't everyone?) and she told me some amazing news.

I don't like to toot my own horn, as a rule, but if you can't toot through your blog, where can you?

I love to write.  If I could be anything I wanted, I would be a professional student.  I would change majors every time I earned a degree, as log as it was in something fairly useless and academic.  I'd get degrees in history, literature, psychology, sociology, humanities, and anything else I could use to put pen to paper.  Then, by night, I would be a crime-fighting vampire novelist, but that's another entry.

As a music major, I had the opportunity to write several extremely useless research papers.  Several of these were presented at conferences, including one at a national conference of vocal teachers.  (Toot!)  During my presentation, I was introduced to a famous voice teacher and pedagogue.  This teacher has recently updated one of her most famous books.

The updated version cites my paper as a source!!  Me!!  Toot!!

I'm ordering the book from Amazon, so shortly I should be able to give more details, but I was too excited to wait.  If you happen to read this, send out a toot for me.