Mr. Scheuster: Okay, kids, listen up. Today we have a special guest artist. I had a crush on her our senior year of high school, but she never gave me the time of day.
Puck: Bitter much?
Finn: Come on, you guys, we have to work together to make Glee a part of our lives and my girlfriend Quinn is pregnant!
Rachel: Oh, Finn...I love you.
Mr. Scheuster: Quiet, guys. This is serious. Our guest artist this week is here to teach you what Glee is really about. Please welcome Deb.
Kurt: What can she teach us? She's a natural brunette.
Deb: Shut your pie-hole, you.
Kurt: Yes, Ma'am.
Sue: I think I love you.
Deb: (to Sue) You too, Windbreaker. (to the kids) Glee isn't about lip-syncing to awesomely crafted arrangements of utterly inappropriate material. Glee is about finding your inner Broadway star.
Quinn: Broadway? Please, so lame.
Deb: No, what's lame is using the word "lame" when no one has ever seen you wear anything other than a cheerleading outfit. (to Mr. Scheuster:) Your wife isn't really pregnant. There, I've said it. Go marry the counselor, please, so we can get on with rehearsal.
Mr. Scheuster: Okie dokie. (exits)
Deb: Now let's get down to it. This is real Glee club, everyone: hats and canes, get in formation for "One" from A Chorus Line.
Deb: Another word out of you, and we're doing Cats next.
Kurt: (silent but adoring)
Mom Tweets Daughter’s Funny Observations - Kelly Oxford is a Twitter power user, a screenwriter, a New York Times bestselling author. She’s also mother of a 7-year-old whose wit gives Mom a run for ...
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