Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Kerfuffle No. 1

I love the word "kerfuffle." It's fun to say, it's fun to write, and it means something fun to contemplate.

Kerfuffle, basically, is a commotion, a disturbance, or some other form of mild chaos.

My favorite current kerfuffles, in no particular order:

1. Miss California 2009 vs. the Gay Media Elite

The players:

Carrie Prejean, Miss California 2009, pictured below in less complicated times.

Perez Hilton, gossip columnist and member of the Gay Media Elite:

And Donald Trump, celebrity mogul and owner of the Miss USA pageant contestants:

(Boy, looking over those pictures, I'm glad I thought to add captions. Otherwise, you might not be able to tell them apart!)

The kerfuffle in this case began at this year's widely viewed Miss USA pageant. Miss California drew Perez Hilton, one of the "celebrity" judges, as her questioner for the infamous "interview" portion, in which the contestants must prove that they are carbon-based life forms that can blink more than once per minute. Hilton asked Miss California if she felt other states should follow the four states who (at that time) currently allowed same-sex marriage.

Prejean: I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land that you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage and, you know what, in my country and my family I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anyone out there but that's how I was raised and that's how I think it should be between a man and a woman.

Perez Hilton: You dumb -----. That's why I voted against you and you lost, ha ha.

Fox News: No! The Gay Media Elite robbed us of our rightful Miss USA!

Prejean: [becomes a celebrity spokesmodel for traditional marriage]

Gay Media Elite: No! A beauty queen is speaking out against us! That can't be allowed!

Prejean: [appears on several news programs]

Fox News: Yay! A conservative beauty queen who likes traditional marriage!

Prejean: [courageously makes more appearances]

Gay Media Elite: Yay! She posed in naked pictures!

Prejean: No, they were modeling shots. And I was 17. And it was only one picture.

Gay Media Elite: What about these?

Topless Photos: Hello!

Prejean: The wind blew my top off. (she really said this)

Fox News: [facepalm]

Trump: It's my decision whether or not this woman should remain Miss California.

Pageant Folk: Well, she lied on her application about nude/semi-nude photos, she's been ignoring her duties as Miss California to do work for this political organization, we've had to create a title for her runner-up so she can make the appearances instead...

Trump: You had me at nude photos. She stays.

Gay Media Elite: No!

Fox News: Yay?

Prejean: [signs more deals]

Miss California First Runner Up: Hey!

Now that's good kerfuffle.


Kristina P. said...

This made me laugh out loud. Especially about the wind blowing her top off and Trump then giving her the green light. So, so true.

Boy Mom said...

Oh Deb, you always put celebrity and politics into such brilliant perspective. The Fox responses really cleared up my kerfuffle over which party in this scandal deserved my undying allegiance. Thanks for your tireless efforts serving the public.

Barbaloot said...

Poor nude photos. They totally got the shaft in all this kerfuffle.

Debbie said...

Remind me again, who won that pageant?

the domestic flunky said...

A good beauty queen is hard to find.