Marriage Communication

Sven says: "We need to get the house cleaned up."

Sven means: "You need to get the house cleaned up."

Deb hears: "You're a terrible housekeeper."

Deb says: "What do you mean by that?"



Sven says: "Do you want me to keep the kids for a few minutes so you can get on the treadmill?"

Sven means: "Go get on the treadmill that I spent $600 on because you wanted it."

Deb hears: "Fatty, fatty, two by four..."

Deb says: "What do you mean by that?"



Deb says: "If you want a shower this morning, you need to get up now."

Deb means: "Get out of bed, lazy bones."

Sven hears: "You stink, you dirty pig."

Sven says: "What do you mean by that?"



Sven says: "I can't find the snarfle."

Sven means: "Deb, get up and find me the snarfle."

Deb understands this perfectly.

Deb says: "Did you look for it?"

Deb means: "I know you just want me to find it for you, but I'm going to make you work for it."

Sven understands this perfectly.

Sven responds: "Of course I looked for it!"

Sven means: "I walked to a room and spun around three times with my eyes open."

Deb understands this perfectly and, sighing, goes to find the snarfle, currently located six inches from Sven's right foot.



Deb says: "What do you want for dinner?"

Deb means: "Please tell me what you want for dinner please please just this once have an opinion on something before I do and you just shoot it down please please."

Sven hears: "Blah blah blah dinner?"

Sven says: "I don't care, whatever you want is fine."

Deb lunges at Sven and bludgeons him with a bag of shredded cheese.