Epiphanies/Deep Thoughts

Lately, I've been having a lot of epiphanies and deep thoughts. I've been eating a lot of fiber, so, there you go.

In the hopes of saving you the 34 years it took me to arrive to these conclusions, I am listing them here for you.

1. If you are an optimist, you will be sad sometimes. If you are a pessimist, you will be sad all the time.

2. I have worked very hard for my happiness. But, some people work very hard at unhappiness. That is their right, as much as happiness is mine.

3. I can't fix anyone but me. Fortunately, there is a lot of work to be done.

4. Air freshener fools no one.

5. Watching cooking shows on TV does not make me a "foodie," any more than watching Project Runway makes me a fashion insider. When I refer to undercooked spaghetti as "a failure of execution," I am being pretentious and silly.

6. I do not need to apologize for taking time for me sometimes. But when I take that time, I need to do something with it that I will be happy about.

7. Just because I love my children doesn't mean I have to always like them. I usually do. Just not always.

8. The best thing I can teach my students is to love learning.

9. If I am going to complain about something, I should be willing to step up and take responsibility for it. If I don't want to do it myself, I should shut up and be grateful someone else has taken on the job.

10. I think too much.

Have a good day, everyone!

You Can Do It?

It seems that I hear this phrase often: "If I can do it, anyone can!" Or, "If I did this, you can do it!" This expression has always, always bothered me, but it wasn't until recently that I really thought about why.


Let's analyze this phrase:

If I Can Do It, ANYONE CAN!!

Really? So what you're saying, tiny blond woman who already looked good in a bikini, there is no one else on this planet who has more difficult time losing weight? No one else on earth has experienced the significance of your personal struggle with weight, so your two-weeks' worth of speed and plant estrogen is all it should take for anyone? Interesting.

Even Marie Osmond, bless her stretch pants, says it in her Nutri-System ads. Now, I love Marie, but if her message is that a celebrity with more time and resources at hand than most of us will ever command has even more of a struggle than we do, my love is somewhat tempered.

I confess this has begun to really offend me. I know you couldn't tell, since I hide my feelings so well.

I wish we could all accept the amazing and infinite variety that is humanity and stop trying to make everything a competition.

I know it's just a saying, but it's one I'm trying to avoid.

Now, for those of you who want my bread recipe, I'll be happy to share. It's so easy. In fact, if I can do it...